Monday, 17 December 2012
How bad is Office Romance...2
1. Their position in the office: The first thing to consider before you go serenading your love to your new crush is his/her position in the office. Is he/she a subordinate, a boss or just a colleague?
Remember, irrespective of who you choose to date, there are risks involved.
Dating your colleague might lead to competition and rivalry which might affect your relationship. Issues such as job promotions could lead to jealousy.
Dating your boss might spring up jealousy and favouritism among your colleagues. And at times, disrespect could breed in such an affair. Remember familiarity breeds contempt.
Dating a subordinate could likewise lead to favouritism and false accusations of breaching the organisation's policy which might get you fired. It could question your credibility as a leader. Often times, it could lead to sexual harassment.
2. Your Motive: Why do you want to date your boss, subordinate or colleague? Is there an ulterior motive attached to your decision? Often times, people get into these affairs for one motive or the other. It could be to get a promotion, or some other selfish reasons. Whatever the case, you should be ready to pay the price that comes along with it.
3.How does it affect your performance in the office: Will your new office romance endanger your career? Will it expose you to ridicule or help build your profession?
Will it bring about distraction that might affect your input in the office?
4. Your relationship with others: Will your office romance put you in the bad spot of others? Will they see you as an enemy or a friend, say you are engaged in a relationship with your boss? Will they rather have a hearty discussion in your absence or go mum when you are around?
5. Balancing your emotions and your career: Let's face it, when it comes to office romance, a lot of awry emotions can spring up. From flirting to jealousy and disrespect. How do you handle such emotions? Say for example, if your boss have a crush on your partner or openly flirt with him/her in your presence, how do you handle such emotions? Irritation creeps in before disrespect starts sowing its seed. This might lead to confrontations if you are not careful which might affect your career.
6. Rejection or break-up: What if you get turned down? How will you handle it? How you process this reaction will automatically affect your input in your work. Especially when you see them hanging out with your boss or someone you resent in the office. This might affect your mental capacity.
In the case of break-up, you have to figure out how you can carry out normal conversations or office duties without letting your ex know how much hurt you feel. Unfortunately, it is very difficult and often times lead to one resigning from his/her job.
If after considering this, you still want to go ahead with your heart, then you have to think of how to make it work.
1. Be professional: If your organisation encourages office romance with laid down rules governing such, do keep to it. By all means, be professional. Don't bring your lovers fight to the office and entertain your colleagues with your bickering. Never allow your relationship get in the way of your career. Try to see each other as a colleague or boss or subordinate. The mushy mushy thing can continue after work.
2. Avoid excess public display of affection: So you are in love and you want everyone to know, don't flaunt it in your working environment. You might offend others by that. You can also put your relationship at risk as others who are jealous of you could easily prey on that by saying nasty things behind your back.
3.Be discreet: What if your organisation doesn't encourage office relationship but you are bent on dating your colleague, what's your easy way out? Simple, use the various social networking sites to communicate your feelings. Secretly pass a note to him/her, plan a lunchtime ahead, or a dinner after work. This way, you can put your relationship under wraps without giving out a hint.
4. No sexual encounter: This may seem hard to do but please do not carry out any sexual activity in the office. No matter the thrilling pleasure that accompanies office sex, it's bad for your relationship. And guess what? Everyone will know. Imagine the knowing smiles and nods your colleagues exchanges whenever you come out of your boss' office.
5. Honesty: Finally, be honest with each other. Don't let jealousy and other insecurity issues to get in the way of your relationship. Dishonesty can rip apart your relationship. With honesty, you can both build your relationship to the next level.
If you follow the above steps carefully, you will find out that office romance is not such a bad idea afterall.
Sent from my BlackBerry wireless device from MTN