It's funny how young men of nowadays want a career woman as a wife instead of a housewife. They want assets not liabilities. The way they go about it sometimes makes it look like a non-career woman has no hope of getting hitched by any man.
Besides that, the social status and acceptance comes into play. The argument seem to be directed at the physical qualities of these two types of wives. Some men argued that lots of women today get married and when they become housewife ,they start eating recklessly,put on weight,and refuse to even dress to impress their men anymore. They'll rather dress to show of the prowess of their wardrobe off to their friends at funerals, church weddings, engagements. And the most painful fact is they use the marriage as their point of security to do all these,unlike a career woman who's conscious of a lot of things including but not limited to her clothing or outfit especially.
Sadly you can't just yab her and perhaps even kick her out when it gets to that point..lol
In essence, a career woman appeal more to the man than the housewife in her dressing.
Financially, the career woman seem to steal the spotlight again. She is independent and that's what most men in the society want. Miss independent. Someone who won't bring the extra burden, rather would help taking the burden off their shoulders.
However, I wonder if that is the only role a woman should play in the marital home. Is she just there to help financially? Does been financially independent help her build a better home? How does she cope with all the demands from home and her workplace?
What about the housewife? Does her choice to be a housewife make her financially dependent on her husband? Does it relegate her in the eyes of society? Does her position make her suggestions irrelevant in family decisions?
In terms of romance and proper taking care of the family. Who do you think gets the upper hand; the housewife or the career woman?
Who will go the extra mile to make a home, keep the family happy?
#TGIF#
Let the heat begin!!!
The real question is, how do you define career? Are staying home mothers who supported their children, husbands, family members: Old and young, not a career? Are market women selling their wares to support their families not a career? Are mothers that followed their husbands to the farm or market not a career?
ReplyDeleteMany women took care of their children without going into the office...are these women not engaged in a career? It's about time that our concept of career, values, and contribution to the society be redefined.
My point is that not only those going to the office and got paid on pay day are the only ones with careers.
There is no statistics of men wanting career women instead of non-career women (if there should be such a thing as non career women)
As I see it, it seems to me that each individual has its own preferences. Each woman dresses differently.
To be frank, the so called office career women who now dress with everything "fake": fake hair, fake finger nails, fake eye larches, half dressed tops with bellies showing all over the place, may not be, an ideal attire or dressing to entice every man. To each its own. No more decency. No more morals, no more values....
Or may be, there should be institutions or businesses set up to teach women how to dress to satisfy their better half. There is no one fit all for every man or woman for that matter.
I agree with u on the part where we need to redefine the term career. I really do know of some housewives who engage in petty biz but make huge amounts of money to support the family. However my argument is that should financial capability and social status be the basis of choosing a wife?
DeleteIn Nigeria here, it's alarming to hear of an uneducated bachelor clamouring for a woman that works or have a career. They don't a woman that will stay at home. Funny, there are some men out there who know the benefits of having a happy home and would want to marry a woman they feel comfortable with, irrespective of he financial or educational background. This norm is gently seeping into the society and I thiink it's a wrong idea.
Nevertheless, I do know that not all housewives make better wives or can take proper care of the home.
I do believe like u pointed out that it all bored down to individual preferences. Each human being has their own qualities which may be good or bad. Career or financial status won't make a woman a better wife if she can't take care of her man, her family or her home.
Interesting case...
ReplyDeleteThis is my take,at some point in the marriage,ONE parent at home is a must if you have kids or ever decide to have some. It doesn't matter which one, as long as it is one of the parents. not a nanny, or baby sitter,or mother in law.
If the mother has the better job then it's imperative that she is allowed to work, and vica versa. In today's world ego can be put on the back burner,thanks to enlightening education (no more the man is the breadwinner, men work and women do HOUSEwork and all that crap).
The advantage to a house wife and children? You KNOW what your kids are doing, every day,where they are,who they are with--there would develop the adequate parent-child bond that the family needs in our deteriorating generation....
I find it interesting that some working women are so selfish sometimes. A lot of them mention "financial independence" as if the money they earn is all THEIRS and the entire money the man earns is HOUSEHOLD money.
Being a stay at home mom is never easy though, what it calls for is sacrifice, no plasma TV in the bedroom. No Escalade, or other extravagances that many people feel they deserve,expensive material preferences that always end up making couples quarrel everyday. Having children requires sacrifice both personal and financial.
PKO,
Ghana
Hmmm... So what if the couple decide not to have kids? What really makes a beTter wife?
ReplyDeleteI think it bores down to personality. Being a housewife or a career woman has nothing to do with the way you manage ur home. A housewife may stay at home and yet be a cantakerous woman while a career woman may manage her home properly despite her tight schedule.
ReplyDeleteMy advice to men: look at the personality in the lady. Marry a woman for who she is and not what she has at hand. Her being financial stable or have a constant well-paid job doesnt mean that she will make a good wife. Likewise the housewife who may spend her day gossiping instead of making a home.
In essence, both parties should concentrate more on building a home with someone that will serve as a role model in the society.
And madam, why dont u ask u d ladies if they also want a house-husband or a career man?
Eva.